I really wasn’t good at coloring between the lines when I was a kid. I don’t know if it was an artistic skill thing or the ability to sit still long enough to focus on the art. Actually, I think it was a little bit of both.
Our girls provided a visual of my struggles at a diner in Glenwood Springs a couple of months ago. Maggie was focused and committed to coloring on the kid’s menu. However, Addie was too busy to sit still and wanted to stir up a little laughter.
Anyway, I’ve been feeling stretched a bit thin and not as focused lately. I think it is a combination of my commitments across multiple pods, my trouble sitting still, along with my serious FOMO issues.
I hear that setting clear boundaries is a good tool to prevent this from happening. However, you have probably picked up that as a guy that writes about mixing pods, I have challenges with boundaries.
My challenge with boundaries begins with a bit of overcommitment. I was on a project once and the lead said, “you would be surprised what we can get done in two weeks”. He was right, we got a ton done and all it took was 12-14 hour days and weekends. Without boundaries and enough time and resources, anything is possible.
I’m also willing to admit that my tendency to overcommit is self-imposed. I mean, saying no is easy, right?
I’m really good at saying no. Well sort of…
- “No problem”
- “No worries!”
- “No, I got it”
- “No, don’t worry about it”
- “No, I didn’t do it yet, but I will”
I tend to commit to things with a ‘Ceteris Paribus’ mindset. You may remember this Latin phrase, meaning “all other things being equal” or “other things held constant” or “all else unchanged”. (Well, I actually didn’t remember it either. However, the concept always stuck with me, but I had to look up the Latin and I doubt I pronounce it correctly.)
Anyway, it’s the last definition that gets me in the most trouble because nothing in our life ever stays unchanged. So I’ll commit to something with just the lens of that activity, not factoring in my commitments across other areas, many of which are going to experience change, making them even more of a commitment.
So in writing this blog, I thought that someone must have written about this topic before. A quick google search and yep, lots of discussion on boundaries. (No surprise, a lot of posts on Oprah’s site). I came across this business blog by David Taylor. He actually has some pretty decent tips in his blog focused on productivity. (I couldn’t direct you to an Oprah site, my wife Katie would never stop teasing me).
However, the insight that has surfaced for me, is the need to figure out what the boundaries are before I make the initial commitment. To think through my existing commitments across each of the other pods and what I truly have the capacity to do. Otherwise, I’m just going to continue scrambling to follow through on what I said, “no”, to doing in the first place.
This doesn’t come easy to me. My friend Austin reminds me that I am not a squirrel. (Doing one thing at a time).
